Arlen Would Kick Beowulf’s Ass
So as I mentioned last week, Arlen is in a Suvudu Cage Match right now against the hero of old, Beowulf, and frankly, he could be doing better. With 247 votes so far, he is pulling 44% to Beowulf’s 56%.
That is crap. Arlen would kick Beowulf’s ass.
Not to put down Beowulf. He is one of the OFH (original fantasy heroes), and always good for… ahem, an epic lay. But come on.
Part of the poor showing, I think, is due to the fact that whoever wrote the stats for the fight obviously hasn’t read my books, and seems to be working from the misconception that the Warded Man only has power when he’s fighting demons. They also think he has the Spear of Kaji, when we all know Jardir has it.
So let’s clarify a bit. Beowulf, for all his greatness, is only a mortal man. The greatest of men, perhaps, but still limited by flesh and bone. He’s fine if you need someone to beat up the local bully’s mom, but is he the Deliverer? I think not.
The Warded Man, on the other hand, is a living battery for magic. Even during the day he is super strong. Like Spider-man strong. He has superhuman speed, endurance, senses, and healing. He can outrun a horse and cold-cock an elephant.
And at night, the gloves come off. He is essentially immune to physical weapons, able to dematerialize at will and heal almost any injury. He can draw wards in the air to cause various effects, and use his own internal magic to power the impact wards on his limbs.
Just sayin’. He would bust that Geat up.
Click here to vote and right this terrible wrong done to our hero. VOTING ENDS AT 5PM ON THURSDAY MARCH 10!
Massive spoilers for TDS there. But I wholeheartedly agree. Arlen kicks some serious ass.
You know you can submit your version of the events, or at least submit something from a fan that portrays how you think the battle would go.
I’m not a writer, but I think it’d go something along these lines:
1. Arlen wouldn’t attack Beowulf unless out of necessity, so Beowulf would be instigating the first attack. Probably due to Arlen “being a demon” or some such nonsense.
2. First attack would piss Arlen right off.
3a. Assuming a day fight:
-Move to disarm the king.
-King continues due to desire to kill the “demon” despite the thorough thumping he’d get.
-Arlen breaks the man. Though a king among men in battle, Beowulf is mortal and would snap under the sledgehammer-like blows from Arlen. Given Arlen’s speed, Beowulf wouldn’t have a chance of landing anything but wild blows, though it would be a bar brawl ending with Beowulf succumbing to internal injuries.
3b. Assuming a night fight:
-Hahahahahahahaahaha. Okay, that’s out of the way.
-Still disarm the king. While disarmed and bound, setup a warding circle to protect the king during the fight, then release him.
-Grin mischievously when the king breaks a given weapon across his body, occasionally changing to mist to mess with him.
-Use the king as bait to draw in more demons to kill during the battle (it needs to be some challenge).
-Snap the king like a twig when it is time to finish the battle.
I hate the way they did the breakdown it completely throws off the entire fight and doesnt give ANY of arlens real strengths like the fact he heals super fast or that he is VERY strong Very fast knows martial arts and can go intangable at night and says his only weapon is kajis spear when thats just not true dont see how beowulf has a chance but he will probably win because of some idiot putting bad matchup data down
I too, think the way the write up was done, gave Beowulf and unfair advantage in the fight. For those that haven’t read TWM, or TDS (which are both fantastic, btw). The very fact that the author of the write up neglected to actually list Arlens’ real skills, abilities and weapons just proves that they are seriously missing out on a great read.
What the frig is THAT about!!!??? Beowulf is no Chuck Norris.
Arlen’s got my vote. Sorta forced my boyfriend, brother and mom (yes, even my mother) to vote for the awesomeness that is The Warded Man.
Totally think they done it all wrong, Arlen would kick his ass no doubt, obviously Beowulf’s paying them off to have it in his favour lol, wat a fairy aha in the end Arlen will prevail 😀
Voted. Beowulf would be Arlen´s bitch. (Pardon the foul language)
The Painted Man would win hands down – there is some gold changing hands here, without question. I can’t imagine that Twilight Dancer would just stand idly by either….sheesh!
I am actually kind of baffled as to how anyone supposed Beowulf had a chance in a fight like this.
My first thought when I saw the match up was “Really, and just what does Beowulf expect to do to Arlen?” Sure, Beowulf may be strong and fast, but against someone who is FAR stronger and FAR faster than any ordinary human, with the ability to dematerialize and heal wounds at will?
Are they kidding?
Clearly, someone didn’t actually read the books…
The only advantage Beowulf would have at ALL would be that Arlen probably wouldn’t take him seriously – certainly not until Beowulf did something super-human. At that point it would be such a beat down that the world “fight” just wouldn’t be properly applied. It would get pretty ugly for Beowulf in a real hurry.
In fact, if Arlen wasn’t going around fighting legions of demons he would be so powerful that he would unbalance just about any other universe you put him in. (except perhaps the marvel/DC universes – but only because they are INSANE)
Well, 60% for Beowulf. This looks bad, I´m afraid. It´s a pity, too. I would hae liked to see Arlen pitted against a couple of other characters.
Give it time, Arlen will be the new age fantasy hero everyone likes.
I was kinda irate I missed the vote. That is what I get for not checking the websites sooner.
This was my response on their page.
I have read about every book listed there. There is no a single character on that list that could stand a chance against Arlen Bales the deliverer from the Demon Cycle except possibly Zeddicus. That too is indeed doubtful it would depend on if Zed counted unmaking the universe a win.
Arlen vs Rand Al Thor would be a good match up. Beowolf winning vs the deliverer is a horrible joke. The “breakdown” for the fight was horribly wrong. ^^ Anyone who has read all the books from every series up there could tell you that. Just my opinion of course but Arlen is pretty darn invincible.
I am a fan of many of the series up there but it would be a pretty obvious no contest.
The only ways I can think of Arlen being killed is if he was somehow dropped into a star or possibly bale fire.. Again there is Rand..
I tried to be objective… I tried!
Agreed, how will beowulf win if arlen heals himself in only a few seconds?